Supporting staff through grief
By Dr. Natasha Hirst on 17 March 2025
Difficult and distressing life events can happen to anyone at any time, very often without warning. Loss can take many forms and so too can grief, impacting on people at work both in the short and long term. An empathetic and practical approach from employers is important to support staff to manage their grief.
Lameya Chaudhury, Client Partner and Head of Social Impact at Lucky Generals said, “Grief is universal. But workplace support? Not so much. Most bereavement policies treat grief like a short-term inconvenience—a few days off, a quiet return, back to business as usual. But real life doesn’t work like that. Our research with Ipsos found that more than half of employees don’t know their bereavement rights, and nearly three-quarters avoid talking about death at work. And unless you’ve lost a child, there’s no legal right to paid leave. That’s not just outdated—it’s unfair.
Lucky Generals launched The Grief Project, rethinking how to support loss at work. Chaudhury encourages other organisations to use their resources to create clear, inclusive bereavement policies. She said, “our open-source policy includes three weeks of paid leave—because grief isn’t linear, flexible time off for cultural and religious mourning practices, and support with death admin, so no one has to battle bureaucracy while grieving. Because taking time to grieve shouldn’t be a privilege reserved for those who can afford it.”
The importance of short-term support
When grief and shock are at their most acute, employers shouldn’t assume that external services are available to step in and provide support.
Rhian Mannings founded 2Wish in 2012 after experiencing a lack of support when her one-year-old son George, died suddenly in hospital. Although hospital staff were very caring, the lack of a post-bereavement support process meant that Rhian and her husband Paul were sent home, “without our child and with this piece of paper with out-of-date phone numbers on. And you’re just expected really to get on.” Five days later, Paul took his own life. Rhian and her two other young children were again “abandoned by a non-existent service and system and we just were left to muddle through the most horrific time of our lives.”
On the back of this experience Rhian set up 2Wish to provide immediate and ongoing support to families who have lost a child unexpectedly. The charity also provides well-received bereavement training and support services to employers to help them better assist grieving staff members.
The Miscarriage Association has campaigned for improved rights for parents who experience pregnancy loss. Vicki Robinson, Chief Executive of the Miscarriage Association, said, “pregnancy loss at any gestation can be truly devastating, and for most who experience it, it represents the death of their baby, regardless of how early it happens. It’s essential that employers recognise the profound impact it can have on their staff and why it’s so crucial to create supportive, compassionate, and flexible workplace policies that allow employees the time and space to grieve without the added pressure of financial or workplace insecurity.”
It is likely that an amendment to the Employment Rights Bill will extend bereavement leave rights to parents experiencing pregnancy loss before 24 weeks. The Miscarriage Association recommends preparing for potential changes by reviewing and updating current leave policies to ensure they are inclusive of pregnancy loss and providing guidance for managers on approaching these situations sensitively.
Robinson adds, “Creating an environment where employees can openly discuss their needs without fear of stigma or judgment is key. Developing a robust pregnancy loss policy is an investment in the long-term well-being and productivity of the workforce. When employees feel supported, they are more likely to return to work with dedication and loyalty. It’s essential that we see pregnancy loss for what it often is, a bereavement, and ensure that workplace policies reflect this reality.”
Address the elephant in the room
Supporting colleagues with grief can be tricky to get right and it may be difficult to know what to do and say.
Mannings reflects on her own experience of returning to work and highlights empathy and kindness as key. Although she put off returning to work she found it to be a positive experience, whilst having the flexibility of a phased return. She said, “not being afraid of what’s facing you when you do go back is vital, because routine is crucial for when you are grieving. Be bold and speak to the person who’s lost a loved one and find out how they feel and how they want to be treated and what they would like from their friends and colleagues in their workplace. Really little things could have a massive impact on somebody. Just not avoiding them by the photocopier or ignoring them in the corridor massively helps.”
Susan Meyerink, Specialist Bereavement Counsellor and Clinical Supervisor suggests that “developing a bereavement policy that offers clear guidelines for both staff and management, along with a grief resource will help remove the uncertainty when grief and work become intertwined.” She add that managers or HR should respond quickly to a bereavement, to acknowledge the loss. She adds, “ask the bereaved how they would like their absence explained, before sharing information with staff, including those on leave. Reassure them there’s no rush to return and establish their preferred method of communication while away. Offer practical support and remind them of available services, such as Employee Assistance Program (EAP). Grief is unpredictable, offer the bereaved employee flexible/reduced hours, work from home options if possible and short-notice leave as required.”
Recognising the long-term impact of grief
Meyerink describes the impact that grief can have. “Grief is a natural response to loss, and it can bring a range of emotional, physical, and mental challenges. These include feelings of sadness, anger, anxiety, and guilt, as well as physical symptoms such as aches and pains, fatigue, disturbed sleep and trouble concentrating, possibly affecting work performance and safety.
Grief doesn’t disappear when someone returns to work, it lingers in quiet moments and drains energy. Yet, many workplaces struggle to acknowledge this reality, expecting employees to perform as if nothing has changed. Some may feel overwhelmed and struggle with their return to work, while others may find comfort in returning to routine. Respect individual responses to grief, some may want to talk, others may choose not to share.”
Siân Robinson-Brown, Cancer Information & Support Service Knowledge Specialist at Macmillan suggests, “being mindful of the situation by taking steps like reassuring the grieving person that they can talk to you if/ when they need to, making sure that they are not confronted with situations they may find difficult, even if temporarily, may be helpful.
Robinson-Brown also reminds us that grief can be felt without a death. She explains, “colleagues may grieve for a future that they no longer have, for example if receiving a terminal diagnosis. They may grieve parenthood that never happens, their role if they can no longer do their job as they could, their good health and many more things. An empathic, flexible and open work environment will help to support all of these.” Macmillan resources support employers to respond to anticipatory grief and advise on how to support staff with cancer to remain in work, even with a terminal diagnosis.
The loss of a colleague can have a wide ripple through an organisation. Meyerink explains, “If a staff member dies, either at home or at work, staff may benefit from the support of a critical incident response. Those who worked closely with the deceased may need extra support, and even those who had limited interaction may feel the impact. Check in with staff regularly, encourage open conversations about grief.
Grief has no set timeline, and it’s important not to expect the bereaved employee to “get over it” or “move on.” A workplace that understands grief, and supports employees with grief, helps create a workplace culture of empathy and understanding.”
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